Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Chop Money

In Ghana, I have noticed women are extremely patient. When their boyfriend or husband stays out too long, they never fuss, they just politely smile. If their significant other has a large number of female friends that he gives long embraces to, they turn their head to the other side and when he comes home late and wants to eat, they kindly fix him his favorite dish, regardless of the hour.

When I first moved here, I couldn't quite understand why so many of them seemed so passive when it came to the wrongdoings of their men. Then I discovered chop money. What is chop money you say? Well, my friend, that is a good question. Chop money is the money men give to their girlfriends or wives each time they part. It's technically thought of as housekeeping money, but it goes towards a variety of things.

That's right, each time a boyfriend/husband see his woman, he feels obligated to leave her money for her own personal needs. Now, I wonder how I missed this concept, considering that I had a Ghanaian boyfriend for a while....and never received chop money. I guess by Ghanian standards the relationship was destined to end. However, I still feel cheated that for six weeks I did not collect my due funds. (Judge me if you want, but I feel I am owed that money).

Anywhoo, this whole concept got me to thinking. Could chop money be the answer to happier relationships? I mean looking back over my last relationship, I probably would have complained less and been happier if I had been getting the funds owed to me. I probably would have been more eager to see him at 3 am in the morning and I perhaps would have overlooked some of his indiscretions, all with my chop money in mind.

With chop money, money this would never happen. 
Undoubtedly, there will be a group of women who are offended by the fact that money can buy a woman's happiness or silence. I say get off the bitter boat. Continue to play both the man and the woman in your life if you want, but I, on the other hand, am definitely looking for a man to spoil me.

So back to the point, chop money could probably save a lot of relationships in the States. It would guarantee women didn't come out with busted toes and wigs and it would probably make them feel more appreciated. Hell, a man would probably be less inclined to leave. After all, he has invested in his relationship, and like Johnnie Taylor once said, "Its cheaper to keep her."

Regardless how you crazy you think it sounds, I fully endorse and believe in the idea. Now, let me go look for my next Chop Daddy.

Until Next Time Smooches

8 comments:

  1. Well I can definitely say this my bloodline must be truly Ghanian. I am the same way towards my men and their indescretions. My child father and I were this way when he wanted me to stay home to cook and clean. Then I left him because his rage was unfit for the safety of my child and me. The tranquility in my home did not exist so I met another who cared for me saw the best in me but it was only to exploit me. He too had many women friend and would parade them in front of me, even being so cruel to spend their money on me. I wasn't complaining though I felt a lot of remorse, what if I was her and she was me. With this going on God wasn't happy. So he taught me a lesson about letting men by me things, paying my bills and being a wife to them before I got the ring. Blindside by his deceit and undercover ring. A trophy I thought I was, I was prisoner of lust when I thought it was love. Until God set me free and I became a dove. Peace resides in me because now I have self love that no man nor dollar amount can take away from because I am married to my God above. With honor and self-respect, went after my heart's desire a career that fueled my inner passions and set my soul on fire. I became what I thought was my best, but the more I get to know God. I know he's not done with me yet... a woman am I with a turbulent past, has found peace within at last. I am Akua Asante, the best of me, you've yet to see. God bless the who all strive for individuality and the freedom to just be.

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  2. Well I think if there's indifeity that's dealbreaker for me, cuz i might as well get a pimp. however what u say does have some truth to it. if a man is doing what he said and providing and keeping me with the basics i would do well to put up with more than if he wanted to be around for his good looks pah..show me the money. so i understand

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  3. I can see both sides...Thank God I married (in the states) so I don't have to ponder the idea...LOL

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  4. That's quite an over-simplification or misinterpretation. Chop money isn't designed to buy a woman's silence. It's not even limited to romantic relationships. Yes, men give their wives money to cover the household bills, the groceries, clothes for the kids, general beauty upkeep etc. and it in no way silences a woman. If a woman looks the other way it's not because she fears losing the chop money it's because the understanding of a man's nature is different

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    1. Interesting observation. Where I come from money is power and those who have none do what they are told to do. Its why so many people are economic slaves. Now, I will say this, even a working woman will receive her chop money;however, from my discussions with Ghanaian women who are more in need of the money for every day survival, they overlook a lot of things. I was once told I should ignore my boyfriend's bad behavior because he provided stellar accommodations in Airport Residential. And yes, they do have a different understanding of men, but is it because previous economic standards,once again set the precedent? In the 50s and 60s a lot of American women did the same thing, but its because they weren't economically powered.

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  5. lol. Chop the money is really hilarious. You write very well and give me a good life while teaching me a few things. You nicely express yourself in your writings. Keep it up! africarock2011

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  6. Good observeration. What is a descent amount for a family of three children in Ghana now?

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